"You go on down there, if you've got the nerve. But them ain't wimmen and children waiting on you. Them's Cheyenne and Souix braves. Go down there and there won't be nothin' left but a greasy spot. So, you go on, if you've got the nerve." From 'Little Big Man', where Jack Crabbe (Yaso Adiodi) tells General Custer (Dick Cheney) to head to the Little Bighorn.

The Assassinated Press

Toto, We’re Still In a Fucking Kansas State of Mind!
The Great American Bald Lemming Whimpers: "We Can't Stay, And We Can't Leave”
While the Most Honorable Solution Is Being Ignored.
Iraqis Know U.S. Is Never Pulling Out. It Must Be Driven Out.
"What? You Thought the Military Was Running Things With All the Sweet Crude Around! What? Are You A Fucking Moron?"--Lee Raymond, former Exxon/Mobil CEO
"What? You Thought NATO Was Running Things With All that Raw Opium Around! What! Are You a Fucking Moron?"-- James Pavitt, former head of CIA's Directorate of Operations

Assassinated Press Staff Writer
September 12, 2007

MANHATTAN, Kan., Sept. 11 -- Rancher Ralph Brooks sat in a barber chair and, in his tiny little reptilean brain, defined a quandary wrapped in a series of canards and lies that Gen. David H. Petraeus had no hope of resolving during his much-anticipated testimony to Congress because the whole national conversation on Iraq is full of shit.

"We can't stay, and we can't leave," said Brooks, 58, a steadfast supporter of President Bush and of conservative Fox News commentator Bill O'Really! "If we just cut and run, it'd show the world we don't have the stomach for it” though Ralph’s paunch is downright Kansanian. “I don't know that I have the stomach to see these guys die, but you can't just cut and run."

But there is a third alternative, one that would confer great honor and awe in the eyes of the world if only Ralph would drag his fat ass out of the barber chair and join with his fellow Americans to enact it.

Its now established fact that Iraq had nothing to do with 9/11 and all of the Bush/ Cheney reasons for invading Iraq have turned out to be bald-faced, utterly intentional lies. Its also established fact that Dick Cheney met with denizens of the U.S. oil industry to draw up strategic oil policy but Cheney has steadfastly refused and on many cases broken the law to keep any information on those meetings from the public. Does anyone doubt Iraq was discussed at those meetings. If there is, do you need your Depends changed before I go on? Iraq has the largest land based untapped oil reserve in the world.

Then there is Cheney’s PNAC creating the drumbeat for an Iraqi invasion during the first Iraq war and then dominating key positions in the current administration. Further, in a 1994 interview, he laid out all of the dangers and pitfalls of invading that now have poor old fat Ralph in so much distress.

Top that off with the fact that the Cheney administration is practically a cartel off oil men and the cynical heinousness of using the U.S. military for personal financial gain comes into focus. You don’t think all that shit is not in the back of Petraeus’s mind as he sits in front a bunch of preening and primping members of the Senate who have no investment in the truth.

How to Gain Authentic Honor and Global Respect.

Real honor and respect would lie in admitting that high U.S. government officials colluding with members of private industry callously and cynically used the U.S. military and the American people to wage war against an innocent country and its people for their own personal gain, the largest untapped oil reserve in the world.

After Americans have searched their souls and admitted the truth they should then ferret out the culprits from their offices in the White House, Executive Office Building, Congress, Media and board rooms all over the country and summarily execute them.

The executions should be broadcast world wide to set a good example.

How rapidly Ralph’s confusion would evaporate! How the world would honor the American people! How again would we be welcome all over the globe!

But a few chairs down at Haynes Style Shop, stylist Virginia Davis saw little logic in Petraeus's call for U.S. troop levels to remain at 160,000 until next summer before dropping to 130,000, perhaps for years to come. She cuts the hair of soldiers' wives, including one she says is too young to be a widow like many Iraqi women.

"I don't think we should give it another year," said Davis, 52. "It's not going to do any good. Why keep on doing the same thing if it weren't for all the money the military industrial complex is raking in?"

Within range of the sprawling headquarters of the 1st Infantry Division at Fort Riley, a place where Capitol Hill seems far and Iraq strangely near, Petraeus drew credit for navigating the tangle of lies Cheney administration has woven with what little he is allowed to say on the matter.

Yet his endorsement of a continued increase in U.S. combat troops and a long American military role lifted few hearts but aroused no courage to take out and execute the administration culprits, especially after three Fort Riley soldiers died last week in Iraq. With more than 125 soldiers from the base killed since 2003, the war does not seem nearly over, all the responsibility of the people of Manhattan that first won’t confront the fact that they were lied to and secondly are too timid to do anything about it, instead cowering in fruitless debate over its wisdom and duration whole the perpetrators of this crime begin signing oil agreements and laying oil pipe in Iraq.

Kansas backed Cheney by 2 to 1 thinking they were backing the front puppet Bush and delivered up thousands of soldiers who have moved through Fort Riley to Iraq and Afghanistan in the past six years to the kleptocratic meat grinder. Petraeus was commanding Fort Leavenworth when he oversaw the first rewrite of the military's counterinsurgency manual since the Vietnam War. Lt. Col. John A. Nagl, a key contributor to that manual and a defender of the new band aid that isn’t covering the wound, is based at Fort Riley.

“How Could We be So Stupid?”

But even here, as in the rest of the Midwest, Bush's popularity has fallen as doubts about the war and the country's direction have grown. Democrat Nancy Boyda pulled off one of the biggest upsets of the 2006 midterm election when she defeated Rep. Jim Ryun, a social conservative.

"You go on down there, if you've got the nerve. But them ain't wimmen and children waiting on you. Them's Cheyenne and Souix braves. Go down there and there won't be nothin' left but a greasy spot. So, you go on, if you've got the nerve."

For a community that needs no reminder, a memorial service will be held this week appropriately on Custer Hill for the latest casualties, including Spec. David J. Lane, 20, of Emporia, and Sgt. Joel L. Murray, 26, of Ogden. They died on Sept. 4 when a roadside bomb destroyed their vehicle, causing the shivers that come when word arrives that an unidentified warrior has been lost.

"A five-second sound bite on the news: 'Five killed in Baghdad.' For the next 24 hours, you're looking out the window. You're looking at every car that drives up, to see what kind of uniform they're wearing," said a woman who asked to be identified only as "an Army wife" because her staff-sergeant husband is serving in Iraq.

The woman, a mother of three, watched Petraeus and listened for a clue that things were getting better in Baghdad, and that her husband might be coming home before his 15-month tour, his second in Iraq, ends in May. She acknowledges that this tour has been "a little scarier," but she calls the U.S. mission a "necessary evil" because she’s an idiot.

"We've got to get it done right whatever that is," she said, "or it's not worth the sacrifice. Maybe we'll have to murder every man, woman, child and piece of livestock in Iraq like MACV estimates said we had done in Vitenam in 1969. I'm all for something as stupid and ludicrous as that again."

In Junction City, a working-class town that runs alongside Fort Riley, a base worker said that he did not watch Petraeus, but that he knows soldiers now in Iraq and others preparing to deploy.

"I followed it somewhat, but I get tired of it," the man said of the long-running debate on Iraq strategy. Requesting anonymity because he is not authorized to speak about the war, he said that much depends on the predictable U.S. Iraqi kleptocracy and the apparently infinite number of human beings they’re willing to murder to get what they want. He added however, “But if I admitted to myself that kind of clarity, I’d probably implode.”

"So I rack my tiny brain with I don't think it's a quick-solved problem. The Democrats are spearheading to pull out, but if we do that, we're going to lose everything we've gained so far which apparently is an oil toe hold in Kurdistan and Anbar. Chney stuck our nose in, and now we don't have a choice but to let him get it cut off because Americans are cowards when it comes to their betters and people like Cheney exploit that."

The Condescending Frat Boy Perspective

Anthony Montez flipped on the television after class at Kansas State University to watch Petraeus tell Congress members that an extra contingent of U.S. troops will be needed in Iraq until next summer and that tens of thousands will be required for years more. That sounded right to Montez, 32, who retired from the Army last year after 10 years and two tours in Iraq. “It will take time,” he said, “for Iraq's future leaders to grow up enough to take over if they survive, and Americans must hold the line until then which might be a couple of generations if we kep killing them as fast as their mothers can pop them out. I’m 32 and I’m just a sophomore in college. It just takes some people longer to get a grown up perspective.”

Using “Think” Loosely Or Coming From the Bowel

"I do think we do a lot of good," he added. John Cook, a social worker at a Manhattan mental health center, sees things differently. He noted Petraeus's report respectfully. But he sees no way to justify further commitments to a war he believes has already cost too much in money and lives unless Cheney can deliver a shitload of oil like tomorrow.

Killed By Cheney. Just Follow The Money.

On Monday, the day Petraeus presented his report, one of Cook's colleagues told him that her son-in-law had just been killed in Iraq and that her daughter was looking around.

"I'm willing to accept there has been progress toward insuring America has a strategic oil supply for the next 50 years, but prices has been, of course, too high at the pump anyway. There's no benefit worth the costs in lives, that I can see at the pump," said Cook, 57. "It made no sense in the context of 9/11 to invade Iraq when 17 of the hijackers were Saudi. What have we paid for is the question. We've destroyed a nation . . . and we've done pretty irreparable harm to ourselves whole Bush holds hands with the Saudi king and his father’s private equity firm is in business with Saudi Arabia to the tune of hundreds of billions of dollars. I know fat Ralph’s never seen that kind of money."

Meanwhile at the barbershop, Brooks was having his hair tidied as he wrestled with what to do about the war something he has no real say in. He said he values Petraeus's observation that the increase of 30,000 troops is making a difference in the lives of some Iraqis and said he thinks a U.S. exit would lead to still greater chaos as all those “service guys come home looking for jobs and finding their wives in bed with civilians.” “If you make them serve a few more fruitless tours, maybe a bunch of them will decide to really colonize Iraq and stay there.”

"Now that Cheney has fucked things up, there'd be more millions of people killed, and what are you going to do when Iran invades them there?" Brooks predicted based on his very limited IQ bandwidth. "I'm glad I'm not the one who has to make the decision."

“And I’m glad I’m not one who gives a fuck,” Cheney chimed in watching fat Ralph on TV from his bunker.