The Assassinated Press

Kissinger Kommunist Hears From The Chinese Version Of A Moonie:
"Damn China, Learn While You're Here In The States. There Are Far More Sophisticated Ways To Disappear People. And Most Involve Them Not Budging An Inch. In Fact, Inert Is Preferable."

The Assassinated Press

Washington DC---On the evening news tonight much is being made of the shout out from a Falun Gong protester while George Bush escorted Chinese President Hu Jintao across the White House lawn. In smug tones the network talking heads are making a big deal because, according to their sources, Chinese television "went black" when the Falun Gong cult member called out to Bush, this in spite of survey after survey showing that watching TV NEWS is not tantamount to watching a blank screen but far worse. The 'more you watch, the less you know' syndrome was again recently confirmed.

Perhaps, the networks can take Hu Jintao and his entourage on a tour of their news studios and give them a glimpse into the sophisticated world of 21st century media propaganda where complacence is achieved with few arrests and where rarely an imprisonment can be directly traced to speaking the truth to power.

Or perhaps Hu Jintao has gotten a whiff of that complacency observing the one of the greatest accomplishments of modern American advertising, George W. Bush.

"Don't shake your fuckin' head in disbelief," Henry Kissinger recently told the Chinese President when the latter marveled over the obtuseness of his Amreican counterpart in a recent phone converstaion. "Don't shake you head. Watch and learn."

"But Henry. You yourself retrofit modern Corvee Capitalism to operate in a post-Maoist setting, what is referred to as Kissinger Kommunism, and China was your first franchise."

"Yeah. To grow rich is glorious, huh shithead. But now its time you fuckers learned the finer points of repression. And on that score you could learn a lot from the Americans. Just imagine. Having your brain scrubbed by particles of dancing light in the comfort of a house a bank owns but that those same dancng lights tell you is a 'home' you own. Don't you see the beauty in that?"