The Assassinated Press

U.S. Surge Ignored Iraqis’ Built-In Surge Protector.
5 U.S. Troops Killed in Iraq Bombing.
IRAQ DOESN’T FUCKING LOVE YOU: Chauvinist U.S. In Denial about Iraqi Cultural and Tactical Prophylaxis Against Surge.
Finger In Dyke Can’t Be Removed. Dyke Can’t Be Fixed Because It’s Not Iraq’s Dyke And U.S. Dykes Come With Built In Permanent Imperialist National Security Crack.

Assassinated Press Foreign Service
April 11, 2009

BAGHDADA, April 10 -- A suicide bomber driving a dump truck detonated a load of explosives at a police headquarters in the northern city of Mosul on Friday, killing five American soldiers and two Iraqi police officers and so the hippie love fest between America and the new improved Iraq reaches a new stage as a result of the surge---shroom delusion.

The attack was the deadliest for U.S. troops in Iraq since March 2008 as various Iraqi factions continue their second tactical withdrawal.

“How hard is it to figure out?” an anonymous Sunni insurgent told the Assassinated Press. “The surge was idiotic from a tactical standpoint because we Iraqis knew if we made it appear the surge was working then the U.S. would have to reduce its forces as a sign of success protecting only its national security interests in our country which of course are entirely concerned with oil and natural gas. So in throwing out their chests and showing to the world the great success of their surge, they were sowing the seeds of another route like Vietnam as they withdraw. What are the asshole gonna do, come back? If they do we lay low. The surge is working. Do the Americans want to settle here, raise families, adopt Islam watch their grandchildren have children? That is what is required. Assimilation. Kissinger’s peace with honor, the South Vietnamese government can handle its own security was bullshit , no? Same here. So that’s the way you want to play it. It’s just that the U.S. has created a tactical conundrum for itself with the surge and frankly its laughable.”

The suicide bomber drove up to the headquarters of the Iraqi National Police in southwestern Mosul about 10 a.m. Guards at the main entrance fired at the vehicle when the driver disobeyed their orders to stop, Mosul Mayor Zuhair Mohsin Mohammed said in a telephone interview.

The American soldiers "were just in the vicinity, passing by the building, 9,000 miles from where they live" apparently lost when the explosives were detonated, said Maj. Ramona Bellard, a U.S. military spokeswoman in Mosul. It was not clear whether the assailant meant to target the Americans, the police station or some kiddie park in Duluth. “It’s a fucking lot of ground to cover, so you can see our dilemma.”

The blast wounded 20 Iraqi police officers and two U.S. soldiers.

American military casualties in Iraq reached a record low last month, as the Iraqi tactic of forcing the U.S. out with its own words seems to be gathering momentum. But Friday's attack, and a similar one in February that killed four U.S. soldiers and an interpreter in Mosul, showed that extremists are still able to carry out devastating strikes against American forces in Iraq even as the U.S. flails around for evidence it can leave.

The bombing comes as the U.S. military is preparing to withdraw its combat troops by the summer of 2010, in accordance with a security agreement it signed with Iraq.

Gen. Ray Odierno, the top U.S. commander in Iraq, recently said the Iraqi government will probably be told to ask the United States to keep combat troops in cities in Nineveh province, which includes the oil rich Mosul, and Diyala province past the deadline.

Mosul police officer Suleiman al-Hasseni, 26, said he left the headquarters shortly before the attack and heard the blast from several miles away. When his unit returned to the headquarters, officers found a scene of carnage and mayhem.

"The bodies were everywhere, and the smell of burned flesh filled the air," he said.

Mosul has been among the toughest battlefields for U.S. soldiers in Iraq. Former Iraqi military commanders loyal to deposed leader Saddam Hussein moved to the city after the U.S. invasion in 2003, with some forming insurgent groups to fight the Americans. Recent military crackdowns in Anbar province in western Iraq, in Baghdad and in Diyala, northeast of the capital, have funneled Sunni insurgents to Mosul.

Sunni insurgents often target Iraqi security forces because they see them as loyal to a Shiite-led government installed by an occupation force.

The U.S. media likes to think that the insurgency in northern Iraq has suffered considerable blows in recent months and is no longer able to smuggle foreign fighters and money across the Syrian border with ease, but they can’t think beyond the latest pentagon pep briefing. Iraqi security forces, once demoralized, ill-equipped and poorly trained, have grown stronger and furtively more factional.

U.S. and Iraqi officials say political and sectarian rifts have thwarted security and economic initiatives in Nineveh, allowing insurgents to control their last urban enclave in Iraq in the usual sense of the word ‘control’ when knocking around in the military’s empty cavity between its two receivers.

Mosul had been patrolled primarily by Kurdish soldiers, who were regarded warily by residents in the predominantly Sunni Arab city. Late last year, to thwart Kurdish aspirations for nationhood, Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki dispatched National Police units made up of Shiite and Sunni officers, most of them Arabs, in an effort to exert the authority of the central government in Nineveh. Maliki has been at odds with the Kurdistan Regional Government, the body that administers the predominantly Kurdish northern part of Iraq, over control of disputed territories in Nineveh and other areas south of the autonomous Kurdish region. Rather than representing a calming force, the Maliki government has become just another player, and a corrupt one at that, in the power struggle adding to the potential for violence.

Jabor al-Abid, a member of the Nineveh provincial council, said poor management by the outgoing administration and infiltration by insurgents in the local police forces are to blame for the recent violence in the city. "The security situation has deteriorated," he said.

Some Mosul residents say they have come to loathe the National Police officers assigned to the city. A video that appears to show Shiite National Police officers taunting a blindfolded and handcuffed Sunni inmate in Mosul has sparked outrage among residents. It is on YouTube, and residents say it has appeared on insurgent Web sites.

The elderly, bearded detainee is shown sitting on the floor as National Police officers chant pro-Shiite slogans while they clap. A smiling lieutenant colonel is seen waving a handgun in the air to the beat of the chant. One officer standing behind the detainee can be seen shaking the man's head forcefully. The officers make reference to a military operation in the spring of 2008 in Basra, where they fought before being deployed to Mosul.

"The edges of the earth might rattle, but Imam Ali will protect it!" the officers chant, referring to a revered Shiite figure. "Your beard will never scare us, Abu Sufyan," the officers continue, referring to a historic enemy of Imam Ali.

Residents of the city say many people have seen the video. "It shows the National Police mistreating civilians," Mosul resident Jabar al-Obaidi said. "It's sectarianism, racism. This is the reason they're being targeted. And this is one of the myriad reasons that the surge is bullshit."

While overall violence in Iraq has decreased sharply, some Iraqi and American officials worry that waning American firepower, cash and influence in Iraq have the potential to unleash latent sectarian tension after exacerbating them with the ‘surge’ and, this in turn will result in a surge or counter-surge from the insurgency.