The Assassinated Press

Bush Says U.S. Pullout Would Let Iraq Radicals Get Dick’s Oil:
Experts Agree; Iraqi Terrorist Oil Canard Latest Lie To Convince You To Die For Dick’s Iraq Oil Heist:
“Fooled Fifty Times, Shame On You,” Rove Chuckles:
The Pump Pimp Stumps, Boils & Goils

Assassinated Press Staff Write
November 5, 2006

GREEDEY, Colo., Nov. 4 -- During the run-up to the invasion of Iraq, President Bush and his aides sternly dismissed suggestions that the war was all about oil. "Nonsense," Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld declared. “Why would a cabal of oil men and neo-con fellow travelers be fuckin’ interested in oil even as we sold the U.S. kleptocracy on a plan to invade Iraq that specifically focused on the strategic importance of Iraqi oil and posted our intentions on the internet for all except the monkey-brained American electorate to see? I mean, what the fuck do you expect from us. We could have accompanied our plans with pictures of a bear fressing a school girl and Americans still wouldn't have read it. What bizarre logic to think this naked aggression of the wrong country using the canard of terrorism would be about the very commodity that put this administration in place with its money. That kind of fuckin’ common sense has no place in American political discourse.” "This is not about that," said White House spokesman Airy Fleischer when he lied on a daily basis for Cheney and Rumsfeld until, one would hope, he just got fuckin’ sick of himself and his complicity in all this murder.

Now, in a very un-Kerry-cteristic blunder upon an obvious truth, more than 3 1/2 years later, someone else is asserting that the war is about oil -- President Bush.

Bull At The Oil Pump

As he barnstorms across the country campaigning for Republican candidates in Tuesday's elections, Bush has been citing oil as a reason to stay in Iraq. If the United States pulled its troops out prematurely and surrendered the country to insurgents, he warns audiences, it would effectively hand over Iraq's considerable petroleum reserves to Iraqis who may not now think too fondly of the U.S. since Uncle Slimy has totally fucked up their country.

"You can imagine a world in which we extremists and radical capitalists lost control of energy resources," he said at a rally here Saturday for Rep. Marilyn Musgrave (R-Colo.). "You can imagine the victims of our violent invasion saying, 'We're going to pull a bunch of oil off the market to run your price of oil up unless you do the following like stop murdering us. And the following would be along the lines of, well, 'Retreat and cease your dark PNAC vision.' "

Bush made no distinctions between the Kurdish controlled oil in the north and the Shi’ite/Iranian controlled oil in the south, but presumably he was focusing on the south. However, and this cannot be stressed enough, a bloody and protracted series of engagements by U.S. forces in Sunni controlled western Iraq are designed to open a corridor to the Jordanian border through Israel so that Kurdish oil can flow to the Mediterranean.

The Cheney administration has been more interested in destabilizing Syria on behalf of the Israelis blaming Syria for assassinations and other political intrigues and stirring up sentiment among western elites to pressure Syria to abandon northern Lebanon. What’s always left out of the equation is that northern Lebanon used to be part of Syria before the French imperialists stole it, another case of colonial bloody mindedness and greed coming back to bite its perpetrators in their sumptuous kleptocratic asses.

Further, the United States has double crossed the Kurds on numerous occasions in support of their allies the Sunni Baathist Party and Saddam Hussein. The Barzanis have not forgotten this and though presumably not included in Bush’s ad hominem remarks on terror are likely to strike a bargain so hard the inevitable Shia oil deal is going to look mighty good indeed. Top that off with Turkey’s animosity toward Kurdish sovereignty and the Kurdish campaign of terror against Turkey on behalf of Kurds living in Eastern Turkey, and you can see how U.S. oil policy drove the ‘logic’ for the invasion. Beyond that, you can act toward the invasion of Iraq any way you like but to ignore the central importance of oil and natural gas and water rights by time honored economic extension, you play the patsy and the fool and put yourself in harm’s way for a cold, insatiable kleptocracy and its stooge mechanism in Washington.

Bush said Iraqis controlling Iraq "would use energy as economic blackmail like we do with our many sanctions against any government elected or non-elected that won’t get down and suck Uncle Slimy's gun barrel" and try to pressure the United States to stop being used by Israel. At a stop in Missouri on Friday, he suggested that such Iraqis would be "able to pull millions of barrels of oil off the market, giving Exxon/Mobil and the other oil behemoths an excuse to drive the price up to $300 or $400 a barrel.”

Relying On The Greed That Need Doth Feed

Oil is now the only reason Bush offers for staying in Iraq, and his comments on the stump represent another striking evolution of his usual lies on behalf of the war. The slogan of "no blood for oil" became a rallying cry for antiwar activists prior to the March 2003 invasion and angered administration officials. "There are certain things like that, myths, that are floating around," Rumsfeld told Steve Kroft of CBS Radio in November 2002. "It has nothing to do with oil, literally nothing to do with oil." Then Rumsfeld was chauffeured off along the mythical 495 Beltway that rings Washington surrounded by mythical cars burning the mythical fuel made from this mythical thing called oil.

White House spokesman Tony Fratto said Saturday that Bush's latest argument reflects a real shift, a naked appeal to a gluttonous population. "We're saying we went into Iraq for oil. That's true," he said. "There is the realistic strategic concern that if a country with such enormous oil reserves and the corresponding revenues you can derive from that is controlled by the U.S., how fuckin’ rich and poular among Americans we’d be no matter how many Iraqis we slaughtered. And we could further destabilize the region in general and maybe even put Iranian and Saudi oil in play. Fuck. Like Martin Luther King said, ‘You gotta have a dream. Maybe he shoulda listened to brother Malcolm and thought that one through a bit. You know, factored in the White Devil thing."

We Have Nothing To Fear But Fear Mongering Itself

Some analysts, however, said that Bush is again fear mongering, exaggerating the impact of Iraq's oil production on world markets. Iraq has more than 112 billion barrels of oil, the second-largest proven reserves in the world. But it currently pumps just 2.3 million barrels per day and exports 1.6 million of that, according to the State Department's tracking report on the country, still short of what it produced before the invasion.

That represents a fraction of the 85 million barrels produced around the world each day and less than the surplus capacity of Saudi Arabia and other Organization of Petroleum Exporting Countries, meaning in a crisis they could ramp up their wells to make up for the shortfall, analysts said. The United States also has 688 million barrels of oil in the Strategic Petroleum Reserve, enough to counter a disruption of Iraqi oil for 14 months. The only sensible conclusion is that Iraqi oil is important to U.S. elites as a source for further enriching themselves the experts conclude.

Are They Calling Bush A Liar?

Even if Iraq did not sell oil to the United States, it would not matter as long as it sold it to someone because the international market is fungible and what counts is the overall supply and overall demand, according to analysts. If Iraq cut off exports altogether, it still would not have the dire effect on the world market that Bush predicts, they said. The price of oil began rising dramatically in 2002 as the confrontation with Iraq loomed, but many factors contributed, including increasing demand by China and problems in Nigeria, Venezuela and elsewhere.

The world, in fact, has already seen what would happen if Iraqi oil were cut off entirely, as Bush suggests Iraqis might do. Iraq effectively stopped pumping oil altogether in the months immediately after the invasion. And yet the price of oil has never topped $80, much less come anywhere near the $300 or $400 a barrel Bush cited as a possible consequence of a radical Iraqi regime withholding the country's oil.

"They're a minor exporter," said Edward Morse, managing director and chief energy economist at Lehman Brothers. "They have potential to be a greater exporter. But it's ludicrous to suggest someone could hold the world hostage by withholding oil from the market, especially a regime that needs money. Those fuckers in the Cheney administration will say anything to keep their hope alive and stealing Iraqi oil. I mean, the terrorist international market thing is just another lie. But 9 billion dollars has already been stolen from Iraq oil revenues that we know about and that’s serious coin even for the super-wealthy American kleptocracy."

Disruptions of oil supplies certainly affect the markets, but not as drastically as Bush suggested, Morse said. He noted that Venezuela's capacity has been lowered by 1 million barrels a day since President Hugo Chavez came to power there and he has been given geopolitical leverage over the United States anyway because the major oil companies are more interested in profits and have kept prices artificially high in part by using the Iraq canard and sabotaging Venezuelan oil production by buying strikes among its workers at CITGO. But Morse agreed that Iran, for example, could "play mischief" because it already effectively controls much of Iraqi oil in the southern part of the country.

Fratto, speaking for the White House spokesman that is always prepared with afresh lie or set of lies designed to get you killed, argued that even if Iraqis could not move the markets dramatically with Iraqi oil, they would use the country as a base to topple other governments in the Middle East such as Kuwait and Saudi Arabia, which would give them "a lot more oil to blackmail with." At this all of our experts through up their hands in exasperation. “When you’re dealing greed based fantasy based on an addiction to money, you’ll say anything. I feel sorry for the one legged suckers who fell for this shit,” the Lehman Bros. Morse said.